Wherein I Stopped Being A Mediator and Started Being a Businessman.

Quite plainly afraid of confrontation, he always calls in the 7:00 hour, morning or night, wholly unaware that my office line rolls to my cell.  Like the other conversations, it beings with the exhortation that he is trying to pay me and isn’t avoiding me.  At first, I took a soft, conciliatory, mediator-like  approach.  I listened.  I understood his problems.  I told him I was willing to “work with him.”  I foolishly reduced the amount he owed by about 30%.  I gave him until his next paycheck.

Weeks passed.  No checks in my mailbox.

This call was more of the same.  This time I had had enough.

“Times are hard,” he said.  Times are hard all over, I replied.

“Can you work with me?” he queried.  No, I’ve already “worked” with you, I told him firmly.

“I’m not not trying to pay you,” he exclaimed quite dubiously.  No, I said, your failure to pay me for over 6 weeks now shows me that you really aren’t trying to pay me at all, I sternly replied.   If I don’t receive payment, in full, in the next X days, I’m off to Small Claims Court to file suit.  And I will ask for far more than the fee I offered to accept as a compromise, including my attorney’s fees, court costs and interest.

And so it goes.  I really don’t expect to be paid.  I will absolutely file suit, but I don’t expect him to show up.  I will take a default, but I will likely find it hard to collect.  I take it as a hazard of working court-referred cases.  While I’ve never had a client with an attorney fail to pay and I’ve even had some attorneys pay when their clients haven’t,  I guess I shouldn’t expect much from pro se parties being sued for unpaid credit card bills or held in contempt for unpaid child support.

What brought you here . . . and will there be a blog for you to read anymore?

Every now and again, Popehat (one of my favorite blogs) examines the “Road to Popehat“, that is, the search queries that bring random guests to their blog.  Of course, I have far fewer readers than the Ken, Patrick and Ezra, but I thought I’d do the same thing.

It’s an odd assortment of phrases that you might expect would bring one to a (quasi) mediation themed blog:  my name, “arbitration”, “mediation”, “what does a mediator do”, “ridiculous lawsuits” (even though others have that well covered).  Some are odd, but related to some key words in stories on which I commented, like “tricked out Mustang GT,” or “cheetah chasing gazelle“.

But one recent query really jumped out:

“how to screw spouse in mediation”

Of course, I had to run the search myself to see what would bring such a despicable person to my blog, because I am 100% certain I have never written an article about how to “screw” anybody.  Turns out that Google search picked out keywords from my recent re-post  “How to Screw Up A Mediation.“  Phew.

One thing I did notice, though is that my most recent search queries are long on queries regarding my more humorous posts and short on anything substantive. I need to do some serious thinking about whether a) I need to spend some time ruminating and writing about mediation again or b) scrap the whole blog, as I have seen absolutely no real benefit to my practice, which was the real purpose of the blog (well, secondary to my own narcissism).  I should be focusing on more face-to-face marketing efforts.  I think “Web 2.0″ (especially twitter – which is a real time bandit) rarely bears fruit.

I’m leaning toward scrapping the blog and leaving it to the professionals like Diane, Vickie, Geoff, Nancy, etc.

We’ll see.

These Guys Give Ambulance Chasing a Bad Name.

Esquire recently posted five of the most poorly produced, highly offensive lawyer ads you’ve likely ever seen.  These are ads that make the guys on the sides of city buses look like Clarence Darrow.   One guy laments the fact that he can’t serve you the wrongdoer’s severed head on a platter.  Another insults his potential clients, their spouses, other lawyers and then makes promises that, to paraphrase Springsteen, no honest man can keep.  Another wears some Iron Man/RoboCop looking prosthetic that apparently helps him pound opposing counsel into submission.  Finally, we have the “California Switchblade” who plans to “cut up the competition.”

H/T Overlawyered

Please support me in this charitable cause!

I know I’ve been offline for a while, but I’ve been quite busy.  Some work, some travel.

I am hoping that my friends and colleagues will support me in a charitable event this weekend – May 17, 2009.  I am cycling in the American Diabetes Association’s Tour de Cure fund-raising event with my friend Mike, who has diabetes.

I apologize for the late notice, but I thought I would be out of town this weekend.  When plans changed, I decided to support my good friend, Mike.

The Tour de Cure is a series of cycling events held in over 80 cities nationwide. I have joined thousands of others to pedal in support of the Association’s mission: to prevent and cure diabetes and to improve the lives of all people affected by diabetes.

Mike, Jeff and I will be cycling the “metric century” -a 62 mile route through rolling hills southwest of Atlanta.

I am asking you to help by supporting my fund-raising efforts with a donation. Your tax-deductible gift will make a difference in the lives of more than 23 million Americans who suffer from diabetes and over 57 million people in the United States with pre-diabetes.

It’s fast and easy to support this great cause – you can make your donation online by selecting the “Click to Support Me” link below.

Any amount, great or small, helps in the fight against this deadly disease. I greatly appreciate your support and will keep you posted on my progress.

Thank you very much for your time and consideration,

Chris

For more information on Tour de Cure, please visit www.diabetes.org/tour.

Click here to visit my personal page.
If the text above does not appear as a clickable link, you can visit the web address:

http://main.diabetes.org/site/TR/TourdeCure/TDC218008030?px=4766360&pg=personal&fr_id=5592&et=5gg6lJwbi5HY6_UCQXelIQ..&s_tafId=219222