At Least the Lead Role isn’t Brad Pitt or Orlando Bloom

or some other guy that women find “dreamy” or “hunky.”

Sarah Shahi lands role as divorced lawyer who becomes a mediator.

The Joys of Dealing With the Pro Se Party – Part 1

Sometimes, my job is somewhat humorous, which is a relief because a lot of the time I am dealing with people in stressful situations.  Every time I come home with one of these stories, my lovely wife suggests that I save them and write a book.   Maybe someday I will do that.  Until then, I will tell them here.  Of course, there is always the difficulty of maintaining confidentiality with respect to these stories and I will try my best to obfuscate a few facts to protect the innocent those who need protection.

I should have known that it was going to be a weird one when the ADR office emailed me within 15 minutes of sending out the Notice to tell me that the Plaintiff’s attorney had withdrawn.  My second hint should have been the letter from the defense counsel to the now pro se (unrepresented by legal counsel) party.

What really drove the point home was a phone call with the pro se that went something like this:

ME: This is Chris Annunziata.  I am the mediator assigned to handle your case.  I just want to confirm that you will be attending the mediation on Tuesday.

PRO SE (“PS”):  Yea, but I ain’t gonna pay you.

ME: Well, then, we have a problem.

PS:  No.  There’s no problem.  I ain’t paying you.  I don’t see the point in having mediation.

ME:   Do you understand that the Court has ordered the parties to participate in mediation and appointed me to mediate this case?  This is your opportunity to try to discuss a settlement with the other side and try to resolve this case before appearing before the judge.

PS:  I don’t care.  I ain’t paying you.

ME:  Are you telling me that you want to mediate, but refuse ot pay me or that you don’t want to mediate and want to cancel?

PS:  No, I don’t want to mediate.  And I don’t have any money to pay you.

ME:  OK.,  Then we’re going to cancel the mediation because you refuse to appear and I will file a report with the Judge that you failed to appear at mediation.

PS:  Wait.  I’m gonna be there. But I ain’t gonna pay you.  They took all my money.   [Mind you, this is a personal injury dispute, not a theft or fraud case]

ME:  The court imposes a fee for the mediation and I am entitled to my compensation for mediating this case with you.  I suggest you discuss your complaint with the Court or the ADR office, but if you appear tomorrow, you will be responsible for one-half of my fee.  Otherwise, I’m canceling the mediation now.

PS:  I’m coming, but I ain’t paying you.  You better be there.  Do I gotta go through a metal detector?

ME:  Yes.

PS:  Then I’m gonna have to leave my guns at home.

ME:  Yes, you will.  You cannot carry a firearm in the Courthouse.

PS:  Yes, I can.

ME:  You will have to take that up with the deputies at the security desk, but there will be a metal detector.

PS:  OK.  I’ll be there.  You better be there.  And I ain’t paying you.

——–

Thank you Strategic Mediator

Once again, I am honored and humbled by the recognition of my colleagues in the ADR blogging community. Please take some time to visit Sandra Upchurch and her excellent blog at http://uwwm.blogspot.com/.

And once again, it reminds me that I need to get back to writing. I have a story in the can, and I think enough time has passed to post it this week (even though I think I thoroughly obfuscated it for confidentiality).

C

This Oughta Be Fun.

I need a new car.  Not because I want one.  Not because I want to give up a perfectly reliable, good looking, completely paid off car, but because someone T-boned us on Peachtree Street last Saturday.  My neck, shoulders and upper back have been sore all week, and Melissa has a bruised knee and seat belt bruises but right now, I don’t think we’ll be filing a personal injury claim. It was a hard impact, but the Panzer we were driving kept us pretty safe.

It was wholly the idiot’s other driver’s fault.  Damn suburbanite didn’t know where he was and decided that because he had a green light (but no green arrow), he could just turn left across one of the busiest intersections in Midtown Atlanta without looking.  He hit me.  Yes, me.  The nose of his car crushed in the driver side door and front wheel well.

The only person more daft was the officer, who didn’t cite the man for several infractions, including failure to yield to oncoming traffic and no proof of insurance.  I think the cop took pity on the other driver, who walked with 2 canes and looked like he had MS or MD or something.

Thankfully, the idiot guy had insurance, just not current proof.  So, I’ll be sure to have some stories in the next week or so as I engage in two of the most hated transactions: dealing with a claims adjuster for the at-fault party to value my car, which he decided was a total loss; and dealing with used car salesmen and/or private party car sellers who all think their car is a creampuff and the best example of that model out there.  Two sides of the same coin.  It should be fun. And by fun I mean annoying as hell.