Never underestimate the power of a meaningless gesture.

When I first read the story of Ria Ramkissoon, I was horrified that such a story could still happen in 2009 in a civilized, modern society.  In short, Ms. Ramkissoon is a member of a whack-job cult.  At some point in 2006, the leader of the cult,  “Queen Antoinette,” decided that Ramkissoon’s one year old son was a demon because he refused to say “amen” after meals.  The “Queen” ordered that the boy be refused food and water.  Sadly, he died.   When the authorities caught up with these charlatans and fools two years later, the mother and several cult leaders were charged with first-degree murder.

As sad as the story is, it turns out that there is actually a useful negotiation and dispute resolution lesson to be learned from the plea agreement that Ramkissoon’s lawyer’s struck with prosecutors.

When confronted with what she had wrought,  Ramkissoon apparently insisted that her son would be resurrected per the “teachings” of “Queen Antoinette.”   She would only agree to enter into a plea agreement and testify against the cult leaders on the condition that all charges against her would be dropped if her son resurrected from the dead.

Apparently, being on the “losing end” the first case of resurrection since Jesus Christ was a risk the prosecutors seemed willing to take.  Sometimes, making a meaningless gesture, such as the “resurrection clause”, can induce a party to enter into an agreement they otherwise would not.

[Ken from Popehat (who gets my hat-tip) takes a different tack, arguing that her insistance on these terms illustrates that she simply isn't competent.]

Really want to keep your dispute “quiet”? Hire a mediator early.

Mediator Kevin Whitaker recently commented on a news item in which a union official bemoaned the need to bring “a third party [the mediator] into our business.”   Kevin suggests that this is because “mediators don’t go around discussing their successes publicly.”

Is that really the case?  Would a union official really be wholly unaware of the benefit of mediation?  Doubtful. The fact that the union issued a press release complaining that it had to bring a third party into it’s business is completely disingenuous.   The official wanted public sympathy.   He wanted to make the big bad employer seem bigger and badder by suggesting that they wouldn’t bargain in “good faith”  and need a mediator to keep them “honest.”

Nevertheless, Kevin’s post makes some excellent points:

More disputes would be well served by the early assistance of dispute resolution specialist, someone who is interested in getting to a solution rather than defending a position or advancing an interest. Interestingly enough, with a skilled mediator’s help, odds are more disagreements will be resolved quietly before the dispute ever becomes newsworthy. Thus, if you really want to keep outsiders “out” and your dispute quiet, mediation may actually be the best place to begin.

I always tell the parties in mediation that one of the key benefits is confidentiality.   Free from the concern that their willingness to compromise might be used against them later, the parties should be able to discuss their interests candidly.  Furthermore, if the subject matter of the suit is particularly sensitive, like a harassment suit or even malpractice allegations, mediation can be a way to discuss settlement without putting the matter on record.  I keep things so confidential, I even shred my notes after mediation.

If you really want to keep your dipsute “quiet”, then you should really consider hiring a mediator early.

Does how write betray our gender (biases)?

Apparently so, says GenderAnalyzer.com.  Just plug in your blog’s URL and their “artificial intelligence” will determine whether your blog was written by a man or a woman.  According to them, there is a 63% chance that my blog is written by a man.  Quite amazing actually, since I do shave my legs*, which make up about 34% of my body….

Plug in your favorite dispute resolution blog.  You may be surprised by some of the results.

Read more after the jump.

No respect, I tell ya. NO respect.

We are a TV household.  My wife works in television and we both enjoy a wide variety of shows, including 30 Rock, the Emmy-winning TV show about the behind-the-scene action of a fake TV show.

Last night’s episode revolved around dispute resolution, in a roundabout sort of way.  I say that because much like Seinfeld, there is less of a plot than there is a “theme” to each episode.   Jenna , the co-star of the show within the show, was feuding with her co-star Tracy because Tracy refused to pay Jenna for her voice-over work on his pornographic video game.  Yes.  You read that correctly.  The Executive Producer, played by Sarah Palin Tina Fey, orders the stars to mediation.

Of course, the mediator was made out to be spineless, ineffective, poorly dressed, and transgender.

In the end, the dispute was resolved by an irritatingly peppy 12-year old whom Tina Fey believed to be Oprah because she was hopped up on “Comanapracil,” a prescription sleep mediation which warns of side effects like “dizziness, sexual nightmares and sleep crime.”

So, to recap, mediators are ineffective tools in short sleeved dress shirts and any dispute can be resolved be a peppy 12 year-old whose only qualification was middle school Vice President.

No respect, I tell ya.